Friday, April 25, 2014

Editorials (For Uncle David)

Two days after Uncle David's death, two editorials ran in local news papers - one in the Cape Cod Times and the other in the Barnstable Patriot. The were beautiful. Made me so proud. I had to spak at the funeral on behalf of nieces and nephews (from both sides). After the Calling Hours on Friday night (at which about 1,500 people attended and waiting a little less than 2 hours to visit with family) Jessie, Jennie (and DJ), Chelsea and I gathered at Mom and Dad's house to prepare a speech. We just gathered phrases and then when they left, I put together a little statement. It was wonderful to gather as cousins and work on this.

Supportive.  Generous. Hysterical. Compassionate. Reliable. Humble. Welcoming. Honest. 

These are all words that Uncle David’s nieces and nephews routinely use when talking about their Uncle Dave. We were his “children” and he was (and still is) ours Uncle David.
Every single niece and nephew has a story about how Uncle David made them feel like you were his one and only. Whether it was chats in his den, Thanksgiving Day football games or spontaneous visits to his office, he made you feel special. He made you feel like you mattered. He made you feel like you were believed in.
He was the one you were excited to introduce to your friends, but, at the same time, he was also the first one to point out that new zit or comment how there is now just “a little more of you” than when you left for College. These comments were immediately followed by that look to see how horrified he made you feel. We knew, through his trademark grin, that there was love behind these comments. We didn’t need to be perfect for him; in his eyes, we were perfect even amongst all our imperfections.

Uncle David was the guy you called when you couldn’t call mom or dad. His popularity spanned generations. – from senior citizens to preschoolers. At an age when adults were embarrassing, all one had to do was mention that “oh, your hockey coach---he’s my Uncle” and you were instantly a part of the “cool crowd.” He relished in catching up on all the latest gossip most likely while stealing your food.

Uncle David was our constant mentor and friend. After talking with Uncle David, you felt understood, supported, believed in.  And best of all….these conversations always…ALWAYS…ended with an all encompassing hug, an “I love you,” and the ever famous kiss – right on the lips. A forehead or cheek just wouldn’t cut it.

When any of us arrived back on Cape from school or a trip, you weren’t quite home until you checked in at Aunt Sheila’s and Uncle David’s. When you were at their house you always feel as though you were already “home.”

Uncle David was not just our Uncle….he was everyone’s “uncle.” So many of us have so many childhood memories that involve Uncle David. Everyone has their Uncle David stories. We will all miss Uncle David SO much, but what we will miss the most is the fact there won’t be any new Uncle David stories. What we have has been written. What we have will be cherished. Forever. For always. And we will make sure, that for generations to come, our future children will know about this supportive, generous, hysterical, compassionate, reliable, humble, welcoming, honest guy – our Uncle David. 

I am honored to have been able to read this important piece at his funeral. Jennie and Jessie both read pieces from friends -  they were heartbreaking. So many people adored Uncle David. I wish I spent more time with him and knew all the things I learned about him after his death. 

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